patience doesn’t exist

I just found this scribble in an old notebook. It is in English and I am transcribing it here on the blog as is. At a later date I will translate it into spanish:
“you must have a lot of patience”
The whole concept of patience is based on impatience, or better said, it is only impatience that exists and talks about patience. but if you are enjoying what you are doing, if the mere act of breathing is enjoyable and interesting to you, you don’t need patience and are not excercising “patience”. it just looks that way to the impatient onlooker.
John Coltrane practiced the sax for 8 hours a day. Was Coltrane a patient man? I don’t necessarily think so. He was a drug-addict for christssake! I assume that during those 8 hours, every repetition of every sound felt new to him, either “just right” or “completely off” – every breath he blew into that saxophone brought with it new interesting information. What if I treated every one of my breaths like that? Each one different, each one part of a configuration that relates to meaning, each one full of content and perceived within a context.

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